Revolutionary Discovery

There's nothing more depressing, than when you find yourself a hardcore alcoholic and none of your friends can drink with you anymore! You know the story, "I have to stay home with the baby", "We can't stay out late", "Our two year old needs to be in bed by 9:00", "We'll need to go home and take the dog out". BAH!

Depressing really.

Then the epiphany hits you. Invite your friends over at noon. Start off by serving multiple martini's, and various meat pockets. By the time your REALLY loaded, the kids will be napping! Hey.. don't be irresponsible, slow down, chugging beer in the backyard, while your dogs destroy most of your landscaping! Time it right, and you'll be too hazey to care. When the kids wake up, put on some drug induced, twisted kids show from those hippy freaks at PBS, that will mesmerize the little ones for an hour. Cap things off by gorging on more meat and cheese, and a full package of potato rolls. Sober up for two hours, in the living room, halting all conversation, and drooling in front of the television. Best thing going, you're hang over will kick in right when it's time to go to bed!!

Ah yes. Victory!
God Bless America